Crying

Two Sundays ago, I was in church as usual. The message was from Deuteronomy chapter 8.

“Be careful that you do not forget the Lord your God, failing to observe his commands, his laws and his decrees that I am giving you this day. Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, then your heart will become proud and you will forget the Lord your God… You may say to yourself, “My power and the strength of my hands have produced this wealth for me.” But remember the Lord your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth”

I was convicted by God’s Spirit and I was tearing. I tried my very best to keep myself from crying, so I took a piece of tissue paper to wipe my tears away quickly.

However, after the service had ended, I broke down and sobbed. My Mum who was seated next to me was there to comfort me. Why did I cry? Here are the thoughts that were running through my mind that morning:

“My wealth and achievements are all from God. They are a gift from him. It is not due to my own ability or cleverness, therefore I cannot become proud. ”

I was convicted of the sin of pride in my life and asked God for forgiveness. I also cried because I felt I had been falling far short of what God intends for me – to be His witness, to acknowledge Him, to not be ashamed of Him, to tell my colleagues and friends that I’m a Christian and how God has changed my life.

My prayer is that God may change my character, and transform me so that I will bring Him glory, and share the gospel with my friends. Also to trust that God knows what’s best for my future: career, wife, family, etc. I must trust Him. I also pray that God will help me to get my priorities straight/right.

Rather embarrassing for a guy like me who hasn’t cried in years to break down like that in church…but I thank God that He loves me so much that He steps into my life to give me a wake-up call!

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